Love Magnified

Five years. It took more than a five year journey for me to arrive at the point where I felt enough peace to release my son Cole’s ashes. I am so grateful to the funeral home that has patiently held on to his cremains for all these years. It goes without saying, this final tribute was simply too painful to consider earlier.

This past Sunday was Cole’s birthday weekend.  I met with 14 of his friends on the campus of Colorado State University. We gathered near a lovely pond where there is a memorial bench with Cole’s name on it. After many conversations about what to do with Cole’s ashes, we decided to put them in a biodegradable urn and place them in the pond. I agonized over the logistics of these plans. Cole’s dearest friends were flying in specifically to be a part of this special tribute, the weather looked unpredictable, and we were doing this on campus property. 

The tribute could not have gone more beautifully and I should never have doubted that it wouldn't. As always, we felt Cole was with us every step of the way.  We gathered at the bench, prayed, and we each shared how much of an impact Cole has made, and continues to make, in our lives. There were tears, stories, and laughter. Overall, it was pure love. Love for each other, love for Cole, and love for continuing to feel his working in all of lives. 

My sweet friends never underestimate the kindness, the words, the time you take to build memories with people, and how you make them feel. I am still astounded by how much Cole lifted people up, listened, encouraged, and most especially how much fun we remember having with him. He was quite the event organizer!

One of his friends looked up the Biblical meaning of the name Cole and discovered it is Victory. Perfect. I believe that there is absolutely victory over death and that our loved ones are always sending us signs to remind of that.

We all remember him the most when we see beautiful sunsets (he loved them) and another friend said that when he sees them he thinks of Cole and that this is God’s finger painting for us. 

So I leave you with this reminder that love never dies - it only magnifies when we remember our loved ones and come together for each other.