No matter what hardship you’re dealing with – from the loss of something to the loss of someone – it is crucial that you give yourself grace and mercy

When I lost my husband to suicide in 2014, the world as I knew it disappeared. At that time, I had built a successful business in network marketing and was used to traveling and being out at events all the time. 

Practically overnight, I had to learn to cut myself some slack when I wasn’t working as much as I’m used to. While I wouldn’t say I’m a workaholic, I do work a lot. I had to learn how to let everything go and just take care of myself. That was not an easy thing for me to do. I had to give myself that grace and mercy to take care of myself and to practice self-care. 

Discovering Empathy

Cutting Some Slack

The grace and mercy weren’t just for me. I also learned a lot about giving grace and mercy to the people around me. So often in situations like these, YOU have needs or expectations that you feel aren’t being met the way you want them to be. But it’s important to cut OTHERS some slack too. 

In my case, many of my friends and family members didn’t know what to do. Suicide comes out of the blue…it’s a total shock. And we had so many people for whom the situation totally rocked their world too. They just really didn’t know how to handle it and so in many cases, they just didn’t deal with it at all. As a result, some relationships we had aren’t the same. 

But instead of blaming people and getting upset, I learned how to understand where they’re at and to give them grace and mercy.

Discovering Empathy

I pretty much lived in a bubble prior to these losses. We had a really great life, so I know that I didn’t understand other people’s tragedies the way I do now. I’m able to be much more empathetic and to understand how to help them where they need help. 

I’m also very grateful to those who accepted me when I wasn’t at my best. Because of what I was dealing with, I was not as kind to them as I could have been and they just totally cut me slack. They’re still in my front row – my closest and dearest friends to this day. 

Now, more than ever, we need to really give each other a lot of grace and mercy. We need more human kindness and forgiveness. It’s all God’s plan and we just have to go with it. 

Conley Family Photo

The Guide 

Laurel and I wrote our book Keep Looking Up to help those who are grieving, along with their friends and family members who want to help them, have insights, and a guide for turning grief into hope after a tragedy. 

Grace and mercy is a theme throughout the book. Click here to get your copy of Keep Looking Up!


Keep Looking Up!

Carey's Signature