🐶 Meet Tucker. I adopted him two and a half years ago and he has shown me that we really have been on a journey of healing together….
Against my intuition the day after New Year’s Day, I went with my daughter, and now son-in-law to an animal rescue to ‘look’ at dogs. I had not had one for over a year when our sweet Bailey died, and my life at that time was really too crazy to have another pet. I was traveling a lot and was getting ready for my annual big event. It simply was NOT the right time. We walk in the shelter looking for the dog we had seen on their website, but Ethan (son-in-law) spots Tucker, and before I knew it, Laurel had him draped in her arms and I was signing the adoption papers. 😱
I had never adopted a dog before as we had always had pure bred Westie or Cairn terrier puppies – no previous owners or history. Tucker apparently came from a house of hoarders and a very large litter. My guess is that he spent most of his time in the house, under or on furniture, and with many dogs around him. This explains a lot about him….Why he does not like being outside, any amount of noise spooks him, and he THRIVES at doggy daycare! He loves all the dogs and being in that secure building.
What Tucker does not do well is people. When we brought him home for the first year or more he would not come when I called him (his name originally was Fu Man Chu and his brother was named Jimmy Choo. 🤣), he actually ran from me when I would come near him, and he hid under my bed most of the day. He was a mess. Whatever trauma he endured left him feeling very insecure and he did not trust people. 💔
Tucker has come a long way but what I see in him is what I now see in myself after having my own trauma – It takes him a long while to determine who his ‘super-safe’ people are. In the book my daughter Laurel and I have written (book release set for 11/11/19) we talk about what our ‘super-safe’ people look like for us. We had so many shifts in our life that we have had to learn to be very cautious. Most people just aren’t aware unless they have been through something tragic themselves, that new boundaries have to be set in order to maneuver through the healing and grief. Slowly through this process, you start letting people into your story, and only when they have been determined ‘safe’ can you really open up and be vulnerable and transparent. The ‘super safe’ people are the ones who stick with you no matter the circumstance. They do not force you to act the way they want you to act. They do not push their advice and physical emotions on you. They do not ask questions and respect your space. They are patient and give you a whole LOT of grace and mercy through your process (even when you are challenging to be with).
And, they never give up on you even when everyone else has moved on. ❤️
I almost gave up on Tucker about a year after adopting him. He was so very challenging and I simply did not have the time or emotional space to work with him as I was working through my own stuff. God knew better. As he was healing, I was healing and he truly now is my buddy and companion. I am thrilled to report that he is a happy, well loved dog who has many ‘super-safe’ people that have shown him they can be trusted. Instead of running from them, he actually runs TO them! It’s a joy to see – and I am feeling the same.
I feel so blessed by my ‘super-safe’ people and I thank you for not giving up on me, either. I love you all and you know who you are. 😘 🙏